Easter Sunday in my family has always been a day for family. In my (almost) 35 years, I have spent the day with my mom, so this Easter was particularly hard for me. We were invited to my in-laws for dinner, but I just wasn't in the mood to socialize. I told my husband that it was okay for him to go without me, so I had a few hours to myself. I watched a movie and did some laundry. Not the best way to spend Easter, but that was all I could handle.
It's been a week now since my mom died, but it seems like much longer than that. The past week has gone by really slowly for some reason. Before she passed, I had a strong belief in heaven and that my mother would be well taken care of after she died. Now that it's happened, I'm questioning my beliefs and I just need to know that she's okay. If I hear one more person say "she's in a better place" I will scream! I keep praying for a sign that she's okay, but it doesn't come. Both of my sisters have felt my mom's presence over the past week, but not me. I just need to know that she's okay and that she's around. I desperately want to talk to her and find out if heaven is everything she thought it would be. I just need to know that she's okay.
My Mom
This picture was taken on 2/3/07 at my sister's wedding.
My Mom and my son
This was taken at his 2nd birthday party.This was before the cancer.
Mindy, Molly and Me
From Molly's wedding on 2/3/07
2 comments:
Oh Mimi. I wish I could say something to make it better. I wish I could reassure you in a way that would give you peace. There's a song that I used to listen to, over and over, that would help me. It's called Homesick, by Mercy Me. I'll post the lyrics on my blog tonight. I hope it helps you. I sang it on the anniversary of my gpa's death at church.
Keep breathing, Mimi.
just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of ya.....
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